one day, one of his crew members asks him why he always wears red. The captain responds with "well, I always wear this shirt because if I get shot during a fight, i don't want you guys to see blood and get all freaked out."
"Well thats very considerate of you sir" - responds the crew member. Shorty after, a hostile ship is spotted on the horizon. As cannonballs are hitting their boat, the captain yells to the crew member: "get me my brown pants!!!"
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