1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy, where is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I want to ask where the bathroom is?
2. People who are willing to get off their butt to search the whole room for the TV remote, just because they refuse to walk up to the TV and change the channel manually.
3. When people say "It's always in the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the heck would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?
4. When people say, while watching a movie, "Did you see that!?" No stupidnose, I paid $9.00 to come to the theatre and stare at the ceiling up there! What did you come here for?
5. When something is "new and improved", which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.
6. When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you know how fast you were going! You should know, you pulled me over!
7. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks you, "Did the bus come yet?" If the bus came, I would not be standing here!
8. When people ask "Can I BORROW a piece of paper?" Sure, but please don't return the favor! It's one stupid piece of paper!
9. When people say, "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". MAN! What good is a cake if you can't eat it? What, should I eat someone else's cake instead?
10. When people ask, "Can I ask you a question?" You didn't really give me a choice there, did ya buddy?"
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