Shortly after saying "I could ... shoot somebody and I wouldn't lose any voters", Trump has announced that he will not be participating in the next debate.

I just got fired...

I'm self employed.

I saw a skinny...

It felt good being on the winning side for once.

Have you heard...

Q: Have you heard about the new Bill Clinton doll? A: You pull a little...

Why do rednecks...

Because they love to pump kin.

After I raped...

I'm not sexist. Sexism is outdated, and being outdated is for women.

I just found out...

...but I'm not paying the ransom. -Anthony Jeselnik

This gay guy I...

Now my ass is thesaurus

Diary of a...

December 8: 6:00 PM. 2006 It started to snow. The first snow of the season...

I'm such a perv...

... even the crack of dawn isn't safe.

2 Redditors walk...

Which is funny because you'd think the 2nd guy would have seen the 1st one do...