Girls Don't Poop
The theory of Hot Chick Inverted Naval Vapor Intestinal Theory of Elimination
(HC INVITE)
Under the practice, beautiful women do not eliminate feces in the same manner as men. Rather, beautiful women possess a trait that is linked to beauty on chromosome 9. The trait grants beautiful women an inverted intestinal tract, such that the belly button (naval) of the beautiful women is the sole elimination medium, rather than the anus.
The waste matter passes through the inverted intestinal tract, where, as it approaches the naval, extremophilic enzymes target the waste and generate heat, thereby converting it from solid form to an invisible vapor. At the same time, additional enzymes act upon the transforming waste, such that it loses all scent.
The end result is that an invisible, odorless vapor is released through the naval and passes into the air around with absolutely no environmental or social consequences. This form of elimination is deemed most "noble", as it happens absolutely naturally and results in no disgusting expletives from men that otherwise would presume beautiful women poop.
On the other hand, unattractive females do not possess the linked gene on chromosome 9--as a result, they do not have inverted intestinal tracts, and such are forced to eliminate through the traditional "pooping" practice.
Random frat dude #1: Dude, that chick's so hot.
Random frat dude #2: I know bro, she definitely eliminates through HC INVITE!
Random frat dude #1: But girls don't poop!
Random frat dude #2: Dude, ya just don't understand.
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