Republican Baymax

Here's what played out in my mind when I thought about it for awhile:

"Hello! I am Baymax, your personal healthcare companion. Please present a valid Credit card, Birth certificate and Healthcare card to begin diagnosis." (Shows them to scanner.)

"We have confirmed you are not an illegal alien or are using any healthcare. To proceed, please authorize a credit transaction of $45" (Authorize payment.)

"Great. Now tell me, On a scale of one to ten, what is your pain and where?" (Answer medical questions.)

"It would seem you are suffering from... stress."

"To begin treatment and prescription, please agree to the contract being printed now." (Agreement and stuff)

"You have 'CLINICAL DEPRESSION and STRESS'. I reccomend a prescription of daily 'PROZAC' and weekly 'THIRTY MINUTE THERAPY SESSIONS' to help ease symptoms."

"To continue, please complete a credit transaction of $350 for your prescription and preliminary therapeutic charges."

(Authorize credit transaction)

"Thank you for choosing the UNITED STATES HEALTHCARE SERVICE, Republican since 20XX."

"Goodbye".

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