Only in America!

"Only in America":


...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
...are there handicapped parking places in front of a skating rink.
...do people order double cheese burgers, a large fry, and a diet coke.
...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and leave useless things and junk in boxes in the garage.
...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
...do we use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: "poli" in latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "blood-sucking creatures".