[NSFW] The Barrel

A man who was down on his luck decided to join a pirate crew. There was always excitement, always rum, and always loot, but as the weeks went by he began to realize that life on a ship at sea away from women was a bit lonely. The first mate seeing his frustration walked over and asked what was wrong. The man explained that it had been quite a while since he had enjoyed the company of a nice round female. The first mate winked and said, "You haven't heard of The Barrel." "The Barrel?" "Yes, it's a barrel down in the lower levels with two holes in it. When you feel the need arise, you slip yourself into one of those holes." The man is curious and one night slips down into the hold and finds the barrel. A little embarrassed, but somewhat excited he slips his member into one of the holes. To his amazement, warmth and pleasure surround his tool and he soon finishes. The next day he visits the barrel again, and later on again. Soon he's visiting the barrel five, sometimes six times a day. Then one day as he lounges around the first mate walks up to him. "How are you enjoying the barrel then?", the first mate asks. "It's so amazing", the man says, "I don't understand how it feels so good." The first mate nods knowingly. The man turns to the first mate, "What's in the barrel? I really want to know." The first mate smiles and says, "Good! Because it's your week in it!"