My English vacation

So I when to England last summer. I had been walking all day and decided it was time of a beer break. I walk up to the bar where this older gentleman was standing.
Me: I'll take a beer

Gentleman: this is not a pub sir, this is a tea house.

His sarcasm was quite evident. I bit my tounge to stay polite.

Me: OK what kind of tea do you serve?

Gentleman: well we have Spanish tea which is 80% aroma and 20% substance, a French tea which is 20% aroma and 80% substance. Of course we have English tea which is preferred.

Me: Oh yeah? We have something like that in America. We have f-a-r tea which is 80% aroma and 20% substance. We have s-h-i tea which is 20% aroma and 80% substance. Of course we have c-u-n tea which is preferred.

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