[Long] A merman named Mike is working as a bodyguard for some celebrity's huge undersea party.

He is informed that there is some merman here plotting to kill the celebrity, and watches everybody with suspicion. Soon, he is allowed a break while another bodyguard fills in, and on this break he meets a beautiful mermaid.

"Hello." she says rather shyly. "Enjoying the party?"

"I suppose," Mike says. "I don't get to enjoy much of it as a bodyguard though."

"Well that's fine. Maybe we could chat for a while until your break's over."

And so they did. It was a fairly long conversation, and they kept talking and talking about a lot of stuff until the mermaid said she had to go. After giving Mike her number, she swims out of the door in a hurry.

Mike's break is over soon after that, and he returns only to find the celebrity dead, the bodyguard dead, and the beautiful mermaid standing over them with a pistol. She aims the pistol at Mike.

"Just one last thing before I die- why?" asks Mike. "I heard it was a *merman* plotting to assassinate the celebrity."

"And you heard right." the mermaid said with a laugh. She tore off her wig, lowered her voice, and cackled once more. "It was all a disguise." said the merman assassin.

I guess that assassin wasn't all he was *maid* up to be.