Jerks of the Highway

(Heard long ago, source: unknown)

A man is driving his car on [U.S. 50 through Nevada](http://unusualplaces.org/u-s-route-50-americas-loneliest-road/), and he's rather surprised to see someone jump out in the road in front of him dressed in bright green from head to foot. The driver slams on his brakes to avoid hitting the green-clad man, then rolls down his window to yell out "Are you okay?"

"Why, yes I am! Thank you for stopping, I'm the green jerk of the highway! To pass, you must hand over a snack!"

The driver, dazed, grabs a bag of chips that he'd bought for his trip. The green jerk of the highway steps back from the vehicle, then grandly waves the driver on.

Twenty minutes later, a fellow dressed all in red jumps out onto the road; the driver stomps on his brakes, and is confronted with "I'm the red jerk of the highway! To pass, you must hand over three, one dollar bills!" The driver opens his wallet up and pulls out three, one dollar bills. By this point, he's starting to get really suspicious because the green jerk knew he had snacks and the red jerk knew he had three one dollar bills. But, the red jerk steps back and grandly waves him on.

The driver steps on it, eager to get past *whatever* this nonsense is, but is soon confronted by someone stepping into the road wearing all blue. The driver slams on his brakes, roll down his window and yells out. "Who the *#$% are you?! The blue jerk of the highway?! What the hell do you want?"

"Driver's license, proof of insurance, and vehicle registration, please."