If You Love

The Original Version:


If you love somebody, set her free...
If she comes back, she's yours,
If she doesn't, she never was....


New, Revised and Updated Versions:


* Pessimist:
If you love somebody, set her free...
If she ever comes back, she's yours,
If she doesn't, well, as expected, she never was.


* Optimist:
If you love somebody, set her free...
Don't worry, she will come back.


* Suspicious:
If you love somebody, set her free...
If she ever comes back, ask her why.


* Impatient:
If you love somebody, set her free...
If she doesn't come back within your specific time limit, forget her.


* Patient:
If you love somebody, set her free...
If she doesn't come back, continue to wait until she comes back...


* Playful:
If you love somebody, set her free...
If she comes back, and if you love her still, set her free again, *repeat*


* Animal-Rights Activist:
If you love somebody, set her free...
In fact, all living creatures deserve to be free!!


* Lawyer:
If you love somebody, set her free...
Clause 1a of Paragraph 13a-1 in the second amendment of the Matrimonial Freedom Act clearly states this.


* Bill Gates:
If you love somebody, set her free...
If she comes back, I think we can charge her for re-installation fees and tell her that she's also going to get an upgrade.


* Schwarzenegger Fan:
If you love somebody, set her free...
SHE'LL BE BACK!


* Over Possessive Control Freak:
If you love somebody,
don't set her free.


* HR Specialist:
If you love somebody, set her free...
By offering her VRS and other benefits, then outsource her.


* Psychologist:
If you love somebody, set her free...
If she comes back, her super ego is dominant;
If she doesn't come, back her id is supreme;
If she doesn't go, she must be crazy.


* Somnabulist:
If you love somebody, set her free...
If she comes back, it's a nightmare;
If she doesn't, you must be dreaming.


* Finance Expert:
If you love somebody, set her free...
If she comes back, its time to look for fresh loans;
If she doesn't, write her off as an asset gone bad.


* Marketing Expert:
If you love somebody, set her free...
If she comes back, she has brand loyalty;
If she doesn't, reposition the brand in new and emerging markets!