I went shopping today...

I was shopping in Asda today and there was a weird looking child running around like a lunatic.

I said to the bloke standing next to me, "that is one ugly fucking kid."

He looked at me and snarled, "do you mind, that's my son over there."

I smiled and said, "I'm sorry, I didn't realise you were his dad."

He said, "I'm not his dad. I'm his mother!"

You might also enjoy

Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.