I need your best Scottish joke, asap! Scottish stepdad's birthday today.

I need a good Scottish joke or two to make fun of his primitive Tartan wearin' bagpipe blowin' and Braveheart barbarian culture.

Preferably, the joke will make fun of Scots as a bunch of useless drunkards subjugated by the English.

This is becoming a bit of a birthday tradition so give me your best!

You might also enjoy

Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.