How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Four hundred and sixty-two:
Twelve to investigate Clinton's involvement in the failure of the old bulb,
twenty-three to deregulate the light bulb industry,
sixteen to cut funding for alternative lighting R&D,
thirty-four to cut the tax rate on light bulbs,
fifty-three to design a block grant so the states can change the bulb,
forty-one to talk with defense contractors about night-vision gear instead,
and two hundred and eighty-three to pass a law making it illegal to discuss naked bulbs (or screwing anything), on the Internet.
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