An out-of-work actor gets a call from his agent. "Hey! Listen, I got you a gig. It's a small part, one line, and they need you IMMEDIATELY. Tonight at 7PM. One of their actors is sick and you look exactly like him."
"Okay," replies the actor. "What's the line?"
"Hark, I hear the cannons roar."
The actor arrives at the theater to find the stagehands running about in a panic. The director runs up to him in a fury. "Are you Hark I hear the cannons roar?"
"Yessir! My agent told me 7PM?"
"He heard wrong. You're on in ten minutes!" the director grabs the actor and shoves him towards Costuming.
"This is Hark I hear the cannons roar. GO GO GO."
The costumers immediately descend upon the actor, and in record time, with the director looming and urging them on, dress him in an elaborate golden robe with pendants, necklaces, gems and opulent jewelry. They finish with seconds to spare, and shove him onto the stage seconds before his cue.
The actor walks to the center of the stage, looking out at a sea of faces in the audience. The lights turn to him, and suddenly, a gigantic explosion goes off behind him.
He jumps, spins around, and screams, "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?"
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