One day God calls Barack Obama, Vladimir Putin, and Bill Gates up to heaven to tell them that the world is going to end tomorrow and to go tell their people that.
Obama goes back to the White House and holds a press conference. There he says,
"I have good news and bad news. The good news is there really is a god. The bad news is that the world is going to end tomorrow."
Putin goes back to to Moscow and holds a press conference. There he says,
"I have bad news and even worse news. The bad news is there really is a god. The worse news is that the world is going to end tomorrow."
Bill Gates goes home and holds a press conference and announces,
"I have good news and even better news! The good news is god knows how special I am. The even better news is that we don't have to fix all the computers for 2016!"
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.