Fun with Unix

If you type these in from the csh (c shell): in Unix you really do get these responses.


% make love


Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.


% got a light?


No match.


% sleep with me


bad character


% man: Why did you get a divorce?


man:: Too many arguments.


% make 'heads or tails of all this'


Make: Don't know how to make heads or tails of all this. Stop.


% make sense


Make: Don't know how to make sense. Stop.


% make mistake


Make: Don't know how to make mistake. Stop.


% make bottle.open


Make: Don't know how to make bottle.open. Stop.


% (-


(-: Command not found.


% make light


Make: Don't know how to make light. Stop.


% date me


You are not superuser: date not set Thu Aug 25 15:52:30 PDT 1988


% man rear


No manual entry for rear.


% If I had a ) for every dollar Clinton spent, what would I have?


Too many )'s.


% * How would you describe Clinton


*: Ambiguous.


% %Vice-President


%Vice-President: No such job.


% ls Meese-Ethics


Meese-Ethics not found


% "How would you rate Clinton's senility?


Unmatched ".


% [Where is Jimmy Hoffa?


Missing ]. ~~


% ^How did the^sex change operation go?


Modifier failed.


% who is my match?


No match.


% set i="Democratic_Platform";mkdir $i;chmod 000 $i;ls $i


Democratic_Platform unreadable


% awk "Polly, the ship is sinking"


awk: syntax error near line 1


awk: bailing out near line 1


% 'thou shalt not commit adultery'


thou shalt not commit adultery: Command not found.