Fun Things to do in an Elevator

- To a man, say "Joe, how have you been?", and carry on a
conversation with him like you've known him forever.


- Introduce yourself as Ochenga-Wangaa The great chief and begin
telling stories of your native island.


- Wave hands wildly at invisible flies buzzing around your head.


- Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.


- Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering:
"Shut up, damn it, all of you just shut UP!"


- Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World"
incessantly.


- On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of
the elevator.


- Shave.


- Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside
ask: "Got enough air in there?"


- Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear
yours upside-down.


- Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall,
without getting off.


- When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the
doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.


- Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake
and ask them to call you Admiral.


- On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it
stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go
"plink" at the bottom.


- Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then
announce: "I've got new socks on!"


- When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh,
not now, damn motion sickness!"


- Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.


- Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"


- Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.


- Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing
buttons.


- Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.


- Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.


- Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're
one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.


- Leave a box between the doors.


- Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for
them.


- Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers
"through" it.


- Start a sing-along.


- When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your
beeper?"


- Play the harmonica.


- Shadow box.


- Say "Ding!" at each floor.


- Lean against the button panel.


- Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.


- Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.


- Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to
the other passengers that this is your "personal space."


- Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host
body."


- Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.


- Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.


- Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."


- If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"


- Before you push a button, stare at it and say: OK, Raymond...
LetBs go!


- Draw a chalk outline of a person on the floor. When the other
passengers enter, say, "Poor Danny, he was my best friend."


- Say, "See? That's the noise it made just before it fell last
time!"


- Push all the buttons when people get on and say you can't
decide which floor to go on.


- While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper,"hide
it...quick!" then whistle innocently.