1. Two men walked into a bar. The third one ducked.
2. A chemist and his friend walk into a bar. The chemist said, "I want H2O!"The friend said, "I want H2O, too." He died.
3. Two men walk into a bar. The first orders one bottle of beer, and the second orders half a bottle. The bartender notices a growing line of customers and pulls out two bottles just as the third customer begins to order a quarter bottle, but then stops and stares at the bartender as if he is an idiot.
4. Two men walk into a bar. The first orders a bottle of beer, and the second orders half a bottle. Two more men in a rapidly growing line of people order a third and fourth of a bottle, then the bartender yells, "ARE YOU TRYING TO DRIVE ME OUT OF BUSINESS?"
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.