Forrest Gump Goes to Heaven

One day, Forrest Gump finds himself in front of the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter is there waiting to let him in, but doesn't wish to let Forrest in. He can't outright refuse him entrance however, so he decides to test Forrest's knowledge.


St. Peter tells Forrest that he is going to ask him three questions; if Forrest answers all three correctly, he will be allowed into heaven. Forrest agrees and St. Peter asks the first question.


Starting simple to lead into tougher questions, he asks "What days of the week start with the letter 'T'?"


Forrest thinks for a moment and then answers "Well that ain't too hard. Today and tomorrow."


St. Peter is a bit flustered but reasons that Forrest is correct in some fashion. However, he's sure to defeat Forrest with his next question and continues.


"Ok. How many seconds are in a year?" St. Peter asks.

Forrest stares blankly for a while and eventually answers: "I had to think on this one, but the answer is 12. There are 12 seconds in a year."


St. Peter laughs and asks Forrest "How can there possibly be only 12 seconds in a year?"


Forrest simply answers "Well, there's January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd..."


"Alright, alright." St. Peter interrupts, clearly disturbed that Forrest outsmarted him. He decides to ask Forrest a question that no one could possibly know the answer to.


"What is God's real name?" St. Peter asked with a devilish grin on his face.


Forrest smiled innocently and quickly answered "Andy!"


St. Peter blinked. "Andy? God's real name is Andy?! What makes you think that?"


"Well I learned it in a song, of course." Forrest explained. He then begins singing "And... he... walks with me, and he talks with me! And he tells me I am his own!"

EDIT: Formatting