Denied membership in an exclusive country club because he was an actor, biblical epic star Victor Mature is reported to have said Hell, I'm no actor, and I've got thirty movies to prove it!

I wish i had 2 cars.

One delorean and some other car. I would usually drive with the latter, and...

Moo Moo

A guy walks in a gay bar even though he is not gay. He is just thirsty....

Conspiracy...

They're all lies made by the government.

A Jewish redditor...

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MY EYES!

Yo momma's so ugly, she looked at me and my eyes burned off.

Did you hear you...

They call it crack cocaine.

On Top of Mount Fuji

Sing this to the tune of "On top of old oaky from "That's so Raven". On...

Two tugboat...

They would always cry, "Aye!" and blow their whistles whenever they passed...

Fractured Fairy...

• There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She got her own TLC show. The...

Did you hear...

They think the world needs more Italian ISIS