Bill's Questions For The New White House Press Sec

* "Does cigar smoke bother you?"


* "How many lies per minute can you type?"


* "You wouldn't ask a lot of questions if the President had to hide a girl in
your podium, would you?"


* "How long can you stare at Sam Donaldson without giggling at his hairpiece?"


* "Are you willing to work for Al Gore in a few months?"


* "Please state, in 100 words or more, absolutely nothing."


* "Would you talk on the phone with the President while he's 'otherwise
engaged'?"


* "Do you give your word that you will do your best -- just kidding, like
someone's word means anything around here."


* "Would you mind having sex with Hillary once in a while?"


* "Is your wife cute?"