Best Things Ever Said

~Sex is the most fun you can have without smiling.


~Sex is nobody's business except for the three people involved.


~Your chances of getting hit by lighting go up if you stand under a tree,
shake your fist at the sky, and say, "Storms suck!"


~If homosexuality were normal God would have created Adam and Bruce.


~Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.


~France is a country where the money falls apart and you can't tear the
toilet paper.


~Defeat is worse than death because you have to live with defeat.


~Groundhog Day has been observed only once in Los Angeles because when the
groundhog came out of its hole, it was killed by a mud slide.


~I hate people who keep dogs. They are the cowards that are afraid to bite
people themselves.


~Early to rise and early to bed makes a man healthy, wealthy and dead.