Astrology

Q: How many Aries does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Only one, but it takes a hell of a lot of lightbulbs.
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Q: How many Taurus does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: What, me move?
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Q: How many Gemini does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Two. (C'mon, don't tell me you didn't see that coming!)
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Q: How many Cancer does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: One, but he has to bring his mother.
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Q: How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: A dozen; one to change the lightbulb, and eleven to applaud.
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Q: How many Virgos does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: One to clean out the socket, one to dust the bulb, one to install, and two engineers to check the work.
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Q: How many Libras does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Libras can't decide whether or not the lightbulb needs to be changed.
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Q: How many Scorpios does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None; they LIKE the dark.
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Q: How many Sagittarians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: One to install the lightbulb and a Virgo to pick up the pieces.
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Q: How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: The light is just fine as it is.
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Q: How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Have you ASKED the lightbulb if it WANTS to be changed?
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Q: How many Pisceans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Huh? Oh, I hadn't noticed that it'd gone out. I was looking at the stars.
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Q: How many astrologers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Don't ask me now, Mercury's retrograde!