Apologies to any lawyers on Reddit

What do you call 100 dead lawyers on the bottom of the ocean?
A good start.

What do you call three lawyers buried up to their necks in sand?
Not enough sand.

How many lawyers does it take to roof a house?
Depends on how thinly you slice them.

A man was out golfing one day. On the fifth hole he drove the ball toward the green. As he looked he realized he was about to hit another golfer. "Fore!"He yelled, "Fore! Fore!" But the other golfer didn't hear him. The ball hit the other golfer and he dropped. The man ran over to the other golfer to make sure he was ok. The other golfer, rubbing his head, said, "Do you know what you've just done?! I am a lawyer! That will be $500 for pain and suffering!" The man looked at him and replied, "But I yelled 'Fore'." The lawyer thinks for a second and says, "I'll take it."

You might also enjoy

Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.