An old married couple were in bed one night, about to go to sleep. All of a sudden the old man passes gas, loudly. The wife, annoyed, says "what on earth was that?!"
The old man thinks for a second, then says "Fart Football. 7-nothing!" The wife grumbles and they both go back to falling asleep.
A short time later, the wife lets out a loud fart, followed but a tiny "poof" right after. The husband is amused, "well what was that?!"
"Touchdown with a two-point conversion! 7-8!"
Then, just a few minutes later, the wife lets another yet another small "poof". The old man asked "now what was THAT?!"
"Field goal!"
The old man, not to be bested at his own game, tries to work out the loudest, most offensive fart he can muster. He's pushing, and pushing... When all of a sudden... He shits his pants.
The wife bolted straight up in bed. "WHAT WAS THAT?!?"
The old man replied, "Half time! Switch sides!"
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