American Idol

It's friday, 6:30 AM. James and Jane are preparing breakfast together, as they have for the last year and a half since they moved in together. Jane turned the radio on, as she always does. Soft music as usual. Nothing has been said yet this morning, but they're both in a good mood. James, like he tends to do, began humming to the tune of the current song on the radio.

Jane, yawning as she is still somewhat tired since the events from the day before, says to James; "wow! You should enter American Idol!" She is feeling the good, fulfilled kind of tired. Ready for a new day.

"Oh? I'm flattered," James replied merrily. He is about to resume with the humming when he is interrupted by a short yet clear sigh.

As if to let the disappointed nasal exhale of air really sink in with James, Jane paused before she continues; "no, no, no..."—with each "no", a reversal of direction for her head slowly shaking. Left. Right. Left.

James, clearly surprised and not quite knowing what to make of this, replies with the only thing he is able to say (if you could even count it as "saying" something); a confused, questioning "huh?"

The situation, while certainly confusing to James, had remained calm until now. James was still not sure how this was going to turn out, but he was beginning to suspect that it wouldn't be the friendly small-talk he expected after the first words Jane shared with him this morning. Jane, on the other hand, knew exactly what was going to happen. She'd been waiting for this for a long time. "This is going even better than I could have hoped for," she thought to herself, a smirk spreading itself across her face.

Slowly, as Jane opened her mouth to speak, James subconsciously registered the now wide, confident grin on her face and gradually, his body began to feel how this was going to end. In anxious anticipation of the blow, he flinched. Noticing his reaction, Jane got excited to throw it. She knew that although his body was ready, she'd still be able to strike before his (somewhat slower, when compared to hers) mind would be able to orchestrate and execute a proper dodge, but she'd have to do it right now.

"**The judges will discourage you from 'singing' ever again,**" the sentence literally flowing out of her mouth in a bold font.

You might also enjoy

Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.