"Well, that's all we have time for tonight, but before we go, here are a few items of late news:
"Roughhouse Row, Tower Hamlets, which is London’s toughest street, held a party today for its oldest inhabitant. He’ll be twenty-three on Monday."
"F. C. Rawls, the train conductor, who has faithfully handed his wife his wage packet every month for the last 20 years, was divorced today. She found out he was paid every week."
"George Mumble, the home county’s most henpecked husband, died today. By the terms of his will, his ashes will be scattered all over his wife’s new living room carpet."
"And we shall be meeting the brilliant top civil servant who’s got his ear to the ground, his nose to the grindstone, his shoulder to the wheel, his eye on the clock, his hand in the till, his back to the wall, his foot in the door and his finger on the button. And we’ll be asking him how he does his flies up."
"Until then, it's goodnight from me."
"And it's goodnight from him."
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