A Washington, DC flea goes to book a vacation with his travel agent

because he's been cooped up in a K Street lobbyist's crotch for the past 8 months and he feels overworked. So his travel agent says,

"You won't believe the package I've got for you! Fifteen days in Obama's hair—can you believe it? He's going to be at Camp David the whole time, it should be real nice and relaxing."

The flea says yes and heads out to Camp David. But two days later he comes back to his travel agent and says,

"Well I really liked Camp David—the food, the atmosphere, the pool—but Obama only spent a few minutes enjoying himself, and the rest of the time he was being ushered this way and that. There were flashbulbs going off, TV camera lights, it wasn't very private."

"Gee, I'm sorry about that. Say, you liked it up at Camp David, what do you say I hook you up with a great deal that just came across my desk: the rest of your vacation in Eric Holder's 'stache. It'll be perfect, he's up at Camp David too, but he's got no media spotlight on him, I guarantee that you won't see a single flashbulb."

So the flea says OK and heads back to Camp David to unwind in Eric Holder's mustache. A few days later he returns, aggravated and stressed-out.

"What happened?" asks his travel agent.

"Oh, it was nice at first, Holder went out and spent some time with the First Lady and her daughters, but the rest of the time he was just cooped up in his room, drinking coffee, studying a bunch of legal strategy, and 'talking policy' on the phone. I wouldn't call it very relaxing; the guy hardly sleeps."

"Hmm, I didn't anticipate Holder would be such a workaholic," says the travel agent. "But I'd like to make it up to you. I'll have to cash in some favors, but I think I can get you ten days in Michelle O's muff."

So the travel agent works it out, and the flea goes off to spend some quality vacation time in Michelle Obama's muff. Five days later he's back in his travel agent's office. His agent moans,

"What's it this time?! You're not supposed to be back for five more days. Do you have any idea how many calls I had to make to get you that spot?!"

"Oh, it was great!" says the flea. "You know, the First Lady hardly has any official functions. She sits by the pool all the time, relaxing, listening to great music, sipping piña coladas. We even went to this fabulous state dinner one night."

"So? What's the problem?"

"Well I'm really enjoying myself, then the next thing I know I'm back in Eric Holder's mustache."