...is starting his term at an American university. He is assigned to teach an introductory calculus sequence for freshman.
"What topics should I cover?", he asks a few colleagues.
"Oh, simple stuff" they say; "start off with some facts about the real numbers, move into limits and differentiation, talk about continuity, and if you have some time you can maybe cover a little integration". The professor is pleased to hear this and rushes to class.
The next day, the professor joins his colleagues in the cafeteria. How did your first class go? they ask.
"Great, great!", he says. "It was so much fun. But now I must ask, what do I cover in the second lecture?"
[stolen](http://www.reddit.com/r/math/comments/311bts/a_joke_my_russian_math_professor_told/) from /u/DIRTY_CRAPPED_BRIEFS over in /r/math
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