A night at the symphony

Many years ago there was a Symphony Orchestra conducted by the great Alistair Baldwick. He was one of the most renowned Symphony conductors of all time, and on this special night he was going to conduct a magnificent piece by Bach. It was one of the most difficult pieces for both players and conductor alike.

The concert started off well and by the third movement the piece was bringing tears to even the hardest hearts in the audience. However, in the last movement, one of the French horn players completely flubbed a note during his solo.

Alistair was so furious he jumped his podium, pulled out a dagger and thrust it into the chest of the French horn player, killing him instantly.

His trial became national news and he was condemned to death, and was to be killed by the electric chair.

He was rushed through death row and on his last night he was given the choice of his last meal. "you know," in he said "I could go for a bunch of bananas!" he was given his bananas and the next day was put in the chair and shocked. The watched carefully to make sure he was dead, but as they were wheeling him out on the gurney, he woke up.

In this situation they decided to just let him go.

He returned to his music and conducting and went several years without incident. However one fateful night, at a large concert, Alistair snapped. He pulled out a revolver and started shooting into the orchestra and then into the crowd.

Again, his trial was national news and he was again sentenced to die by electric chair. His last meal came around and he again asked for a bunch of bananas as "they were so good last time."

He was again strapped into the chair and this time they held nothing back. They zapped him good and kept on adding powered till there was no way he could have survived.

Several days later, his funeral was held. The minister was highlighting the high points of his career and had just started to say a final prayer when there was a knock from inside the coffin.

They opened up the coffin and there was Alistair, still alive.

"how in the world did you survive!?" they asked. "I'm not sure, " replied Alistair. "I guess I'm just a bad conductor."