The cop pulled him over, walked up to the car, and with that stupid smirk we all know and hate, asked, “What ’s your hurry?”
To which he replied, “I’m late for work.”
“Oh yeah,” said the cop, “what do you do?”
"I really don't want to talk about it" said the driver, "just give me my ticket and I'll be on my way"
The cop, now intrigued, said to the driver, "tell me what you do for a living, or I'll increase the ticket!"
"okay, fine but you won't believe me." he said. “I’m an arsehole stretcher."
The cop stammered, “A what? An arsehole stretcher? And just what does an arsehole stretcher do?”
“Well,” he said, “I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it’s about 6 feet wide.”
Stunned, the cop asked “And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot arsehole?”
“Give him a radar gun and put him behind that overpass back there"
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