He shows up first thing in the morning in a complete panic and demands to be seen first without an appointment.
The doctor agrees to see him and says, "Calm down now, what's the problem?"
The guy says, "I woke up this morning and my penis was covered in these disgusting and crusty orange sores! What the hell is wrong with me?"
Doctor examines the guy and asks, "What did you do last night?"
Guy says, "NOTHING! I stayed home and ate a bag of cheese puffs and watched some porn!"
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