A few years ago I had a vasectomy. A few weeks after the procedure I received a letter, accompanied by a sample pot, stating that I needed to provide a sperm sample and bring it in to them to prove the operation worked. At work, later that day, I snuck off to the bathroom and produced my sperm sample into the pot, screwed up the lid, and put the pot in my shirt pocket. The hospital wasn't far so I decided to take the 5 minute run over there on my lunch break. As I arrived at the front desk I noticed the pot lid has come loose and my sample has gone all over me. The nurse politely says to me 'sorry sir, you're going to have to come again.'
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