A fast running sister.

I was in a USAF training school- one of about 30 students. The instructor had a habit of picking on one of the students, a guy named Sparks because he was very quiet. We sat in groups of 4-5 people at tables. Sparks did not sit at my table. I could tell it bothered Sparks so I went to him one day and asked if he would like to get even with the instructor. He said OK so I told him my plan/joke.

The next day the Sergeant instructor was standing by my table after giving us an assignment. He made a comment about Sparks again and I said:

Me: "You should see Sparks outside of class. He talks all the time. In fact you can't shut him up in the barracks."

Sergeant: "Oh yea, what about?"

Me: "His sister. She is going to be in the upcoming Olympics. Apparently she is a really fast runner. Go ahead, ask him about it. He will go on and on and on about how fast his sister can run. It's funny how he will talk about her and how he won't shut up about her."

Sergeant says loudly across the room to Sparks. "Hey, Sparks. I hear your sister can run really fast. She going to be in the Olympics?"

Sparks plays the perfect dead pan face. Says nothing at first. I start laughing.

Sergeant: "Come on, Sparks. Tell me about your sister. How fast she can run?"

I laugh harder.

Sparks: Very serious looking face finally says "My sister is a cripple. She lost both her legs in a train accident last year."

No one but Sparks and I knew of the joke. A dead silence falls in the classroom except for me as I literally fall out of my seat laughing. The look on the Instructors face is priceless and the class is stunned, particularly the guys at my table. The instructor starts to stammer, face beet red, and I fear he is about to sit on his butt from weak legs. I am crying/laughing right next to the Sergeant. The looks he throws my way are...evil.

Sparks holds a serious expression on his face for what seems a few moments but eventually cracks a smile. The instructor as well as the class finally realize it is a joke and the Sergeant looks at me and says "Oh... you a-hole. You f'ing...." but he finally starts to laugh himself telling me is he going to get even with me. He didn't.

Sparks did not have any sisters. He and Sparks got along a lot better after that.